Monday, July 25, 2005

Short 'Look at me, I'm a Prod' Rant

After my last post and several, unfounded might i add, accusations of bigotry on my part, i decided to set the record straight. For fairness sake i conducted a similar experiment this Saturday in Belfast City Centre. Same route, approx same time. Results are as follows:-

Glasgow Rangers shirts - 0
Northern Ireland Shirts - 0
Linfield/Glentoran Shirts - 1 (I think it was the new Glentoran shirt ..not 100% sure)

As i said.....Its a f**king disgrace!

Thursday, July 14, 2005

Short 'Look at me, I'm a Roman Catholic' Rant!

Last Saturday in Belfast City Centre i carried out a short experiment.
Between the City Hall and the Virgin Megastore on Royal Avenue (name to changed shortly no doubt), i counted no less than 17 (yes 17) various people wearing Glasgow Celtic, Republic of Ireland and GAA Shirts.
It breaks down as follows:-
Glasgow Celtic 11
Republic of Ireland (Football) 3
Republic of Ireland (Rugby) 1
Unknown Gaelic Football 2

Its a f**king disgrace.

Tuesday, July 12, 2005

Short Mouse Rant!!

I became a killer today.
On Monday last i flicked the light switch in the kitchen to find a mouse on my draining board. It flew like Lance Armstrong up Alpe D'Huez behind the washing machine. The thought of this horrible little thing pissing and defacating on my mince steak and where i make my morning sandwichies was enough to spurn me into action.
The next day i bought 2 mouse traps. 'The Nipper' they were called. For the next few days the mouse eluded me. I named it the 'Albert Einstien' of the mouse world. No matter what was in the trap it was gone the next day.
Porridge oats was the answer. Sprinkled all around the trap. It had to crawl all over it to eat.
Today i had success. There it was this morning dead as a doormouse(sorry).
And it was just a baby. It was just lying there with its eyes still open looking up at me as if to say - 'What have you done'. It was really delicate.
Now i'm not going to turn into Julian Cope but God i regret it! What right had i to take away the life of an innocent creature who, when alls said in done was just living its life the only way it knew how? I wonder did it hurt? Was the poor thing in pain?
Its the humane 'will not kill the mouse' trap for me next time.
I'm off to make a donation to the WWF.